The Butterfly Effect
by Larenu
Summary: After Boq left, Nessa made a wish to feel home again, the home she only felt when she was with him. Alternate universes, time-travel, multiple Boq pairings -Bessa-, character deaths -not for long- , and randomness
1. No Place Like Home

A/N: Chapter Warnings: Alternate Universes, multiple timelines, character deaths, violence, and strangeness.

* * *

><p>Nessarose wandered into Boq's room, she couldn't believe he left. At the same time, she could, she had been horrible to him … absolutely horrible. She felt her world had fallen apart, all she wanted was for him to love her and yet he couldn't. She never felt at home unless she was with him, he gave her home … he made her feel whole. Now he was gone and she was alone … she would always be alone.<p>

She found a box with his journals in it, old journals he had been writing since before Shiz and yet continued after she had enslaved him. This was all she had left of him … all she had left of the home she wanted, the home she felt when he was there. She could feel the tears falling down her face and landing on his books. Tears coloring the outside of his journals … sparkling tears shining out.

With every wish for his happiness, with every regret for what she had done to him, with every hope that he could still love her, and with every breath she had left to breath she had made this come true. Her tears becoming the fuel of her love for him, her wish to make things better … her wish for home again, and these tears would guide him home.

* * *

><p>He didn't know why he had come back to this place. This horrible place that had been his prison for so many years it seemed an eternity. Yet here he was, in his old room in the dusty mansion of the late wicked witch of the east. No one came here anymore, no one dared … they were afraid that upon entering her old residence they would come upon some curse she had left behind.<p>

He wasn't afraid, he had nothing left to fear from her … he had already lost everything, she had already taken it from him. He wasn't even human any more, he couldn't feel the wind against his skin nor smell the musty halls of this old house. He was a man of tin … a monster … heartless. He wasn't himself anymore, he was a thing that shouldn't even exist and sometimes he wished that he had been allowed to die instead of being forced into this hell.

His hands came upon his old journals … they were out. Did that mean that his Governor had been reading them? That was somewhat disturbing, yet why should he expect privacy when he was given nothing else from her. Something was wrong with them, though. There were sparkling spots on them, he wasn't sure what they were … but they seemed to draw him in.

He opened the last journal to the last entry and saw his old writing … something about a letter being delivered to the mansion. It was from Miss Glinda, she was engaged to Fiyero … he knew that didn't work out, Fiyero was dead now. He wished he could have been glad about that, glad that Fiyero could no longer taunt him with his perfection, but he didn't have a heart and didn't feel glad about anything. He didn't even feel love for Miss Glinda anymore … he felt nothing, he wasn't able to.

Suddenly he started to feel something … faint and dizzy. His world was fading around him and then materializing again. He took a deep breath … a real breath. His eyes widened and his heart sped up. Wait … he could feel his heart beating! He had a heart! He brought his hands up to look at them, they were flesh instead of tin … he was human! He started dancing around the room, so thrilled about the fact he wasn't stuck in that stupid tin can any more it took him a moment to register the sound of the bell.

He looked down at himself … the uniform, the horrible silver uniform. He was her slave again … he was that wretched witch's slave! He walked out of the room and made his way to her study, he wasn't sure what to expect. Yet what he saw made his heart fall down … he was becoming delusional. It was Elphaba by her armoire and his Governor sitting in her chair.

This was the moment before he was made into a tin man. He looked nervously from one to the other and then noticed the glint of metal on the table. He reached out for it; he needed to protect himself from these horrible witches who had destroyed his life. He heard Elphaba's voice, "It's just me, Boq, I'm not going to hurt you"

"You're lying!" he screamed as he ran away from her, towards where? Into the room … oh wait, this wasn't going well. He had his back against the wall; the letter opener pointed towards the wicked witch of the west, and realized that this was happening just like it had before. He shook his head; he couldn't let this happen … he had to do something!

He flung himself toward the green monster, lodging the letter opener into her throat before she seemed to realize what he had done. She gasped and grabbed onto his uniform coloring it red with her blood before she collapsed on the ground. "Boq!" he heard his Governor screech behind him.

He turned to look at the wide eyed shock on her face. He backed away from her … she didn't deserve the sweetness of death. She deserved something worse; she deserved to be left alone and helpless. Then she stood and walked toward him, causing him to trip over the body of the woman he had just murdered and fall on the ground beside her. He had forgotten she could walk.

"Boq, why? Why did you do that?" she struggled toward him, her feet uneasy and unaccustomed to supporting her weight.

He began to crawl back away from her, "She…" he looked over and pulled the letter opener out of the throat of his victim and pointed it toward the woman wobbling her way over, "Don't come any closer!"

If possible, her eyes widened even farther, tears falling down her face, "Boq" she shook her head, "This isn't like you"

"How do you know?" He spat before he felt his world begin to fade again … now what? Suddenly it came together into a picture of brutality. The image of Elphaba bleeding on the floor, another of Nessarose, and yet another of … Glinda?

His mouth fell open as he stood up to walk over to the images, sketches hung in this strange room. A room locked off with a heavy iron door … a prison. He took a sharp intake of breath; he was in prison for killing Glinda? No … no, no, no! That couldn't be right, he would never kill Glinda!

He looked at the pages … journals he had written, angry words. Words about Glinda … how she had never loved him ... that word was written thousands of times in scratched lettering … never, never, never. He killed her because he realized that she never cared for him and never would … never ever would. He collapsed on the ground looking at his hands, his human hands. His murderous, monstrous hands and he found himself wishing that he was still that heartless tin man, at least then he wouldn't have touched a single blond hair on his angle's perfect head.

He noticed the box … the sparkling spots and he had to leave … he had to get out of here. He picked one up and read from a random location. He decided no matter what happened; he would never kill again for the risk to who he might kill after that. He wasn't a killer … he wasn't supposed to be a killer. He read … the arrival of Fiyero Tiggular …


	2. Blinded by Beauty

There stood his perfect angel with an irritated pout on her lip, every tap of her foot seeming to mean something. He tilted his head at her expectant expression, what was going on? She looked behind him as though something very important lied there so his gaze followed to see … Nessarose? Oh no … this was the moment Glinda had decided that he should take Nessarose to the dance. She continued to tap her shoes on the floor … every tap reminding him of one single word … never, never, never.

She wasn't doing this because she had sympathy for Nessarose; no … she was doing this because she never wanted to be with him! His lips pursed and an anger coursed through his system … it was so important for her to be with the image of perfection that it was worth ruining his life? Her shoe continued to tap on the floor, repeating that word in his mind … never, never, never.

"No" he suddenly replied to the expectant blond

"What?"

"I said no, Miss Glinda" he said firmer

"It's **Ga**linda, with a **ga**"

"I will not take Nessarose to the dance, **GA**-linda"

Her face looked shocked, and then she blinked, regaining her composure, "Are you sure, Biq? It would sure show compassion and…"

"What it shows is your thoughtlessness and disregard for others feelings. If you don't want to be with me, then tell me."

He mouth had dropped open, so surprised that the nervous and nerdy little munchkin she had been speaking to would address her in such a manner, "I ... I..."

"Yes?"

"I don't have to take this from you" she stalked off and he felt himself beginning to fade away.

* * *

><p>He materialized in darkness … total darkness. His eyes were open, the light must be off. He reached his hands around and realized he was in some kind of bed, then he felt a lamp and pulled at the little cord … nothing happened. Then he heard a woman's voice, "I was reading, Boq, and I'm pretty sure that light doesn't keep you from sleeping"<p>

It was Glinda, "Oh, sorry" he pulled the cord and again nothing happened, "Is that better?"

"Yes, thank you"

"So the light's on?"

"Yes, Boq, the light is on"

"Are you sure? I can't see anything"

"Very funny" she sounded sarcastic

"What's so funny?"

He heard a book snap closed next to him, "Boq, is something bothering you?"

"Yes, I can't see anything"

"You're blind"

"How long have I been blind?"

"Years"

"Why? What happened?"

"It was an accident" she mumbled something that sounded remarkably like 'I was trying to make you taller', then she sighed, "What's going on?"

"I don't know" He felt a soft hand reach out and touch his face, he jumped away at first. His heart speeding up, he didn't like not being able to see and it seemed unfair that he would finally have his precious Glinda and not be able to gaze upon her perfection. "What are you reading?"

"The same thing I've been reading, the Grimmerie"

"You can read that?"

"No, I'm trying to read it … well, I'm learning. Boq, really, what is the matter with you?" She was stroking her hand through his hair in a manner meant to be soothing. He wasn't used to her touching him and couldn't focus on anything else except the sensation … and lack of sight.

"I don't know" it was true; he didn't know what was wrong with him. Here he was, finally with Glinda and yet … he wasn't enjoying it. "Anything in there about getting one's sight back?"

She pulled her hand away from him, "It'll be years before I'm ready for something like that … if there is anything like that in here. Really, what is with you? You're normally just fine with the way you are, you say there's so much more to life so why dwell on the things we can't have?"

"So you're saying I might never get my sight back?" He considered this for a moment, but maybe it was worth giving his sight up to have his precious Glinda.

* * *

><p>It was several weeks later and all they had done was argue. Apparently, she was still called Galinda and would become very irritated whenever he accidentally called her Glinda. Their arguments were over such meaningless things and he was so sick of it. He was sick of not being able to walk down the halls without help because he hadn't lived there all these years and didn't know how many steps it was to every room. He didn't like that he had to learn.<p>

He didn't like that he couldn't see any of the beauty he heard the guests so awed about in the emerald palace. He had only ever been to the palace one time and he didn't have a heart then so beauty didn't matter nor make an impression. Now that he had a heart to appreciate beauty; he didn't have sight to see it with.

He remembered all the time he took care of Nessarose, he had always felt strong and manly around her. She was so frail and appreciated his help, like every little thing he could do was some form of powerful feat. Yet now he was the one being taken care of … he didn't like that. Most of the time it was servants taking care of him, Galinda had other things to do since she was the ruler of Oz now.

He was supposed to have gone back to his family to help them with the farm, but wasn't able to. After having been blinded, how was he supposed to help them now? It seemed someone was always keeping him from his family whether it was Galinda blinding him or Nessarose condemning him to servitude.

He had never noticed how annoying Galinda's voice was … so high pitched and whiny. He guessed it was because he was normally looking at her angelic face, but when all one had was a voice to listen to it seemed to make a difference. He never noticed how many annoying little noisy habits she had or how much she nitpicked about every little unnecessary detail.

He could feel with every touch she gave to him that she didn't think he was good enough. Something was wrong … she felt guilty for his blindness, as well as she should. The way she acted seemed to indicate that her pity and regret were the main driving forces that caused her to be with him. It had been an accident, though. Apparently, back at Shiz while he was trying to win her over, she had decided that his worst quality was his shortness. So, being a student of sorcery, she decided to make him taller. However, she wasn't the best at sorcery and just ended up blinding him.

He asked one of the servants to find his old journals, one of the ones with the sparkling spots on it; he wanted to be read from the journal. So the servant returned once he found it and began to read, something about Elphaba….


	3. Irritating the Corn

A/N: Chapter Warnings: Mentions of attempted suicide

* * *

><p>There she was … Elphaba Thropp; she looked beautiful to him now, the vibrant color of her skin simply breathtaking … everything looked beautiful. He remembered that everyone loathed her and it was because Galinda loathed her, wasn't he party to this? Why? Why had he been part of this crowd? That's right; because he thought it would make Galinda happy … perhaps get her attention. Did he really want her attention? He wasn't sure anymore, all he really knew was that Galinda didn't really care about him, even when he had her he didn't feel like she was really his … not to mention the fact that she blinded him.<p>

It was time to make a change, he walked up to the green misfit, "Hello, my name is Boq"

She looked up from the book she was reading and pushed her glasses further back on her face, "What do you want?"

"I wanted to say hello"

"You've said it" she looked back down

He shifted uncomfortably; she certainly made it difficult for someone to talk to her. "We used to know each other" he blurted out

She looked back up with a raised brow, "How is that?"

"In munchkin land, we went to school together"

Her eyes narrowed, "We went to school about a decade ago and yet you somehow still remember"

"You're … k-kind of hard to … forget"

She blinked, "Good bye, Master Boq" then she stood up and walked away from him. He felt his world fading away

* * *

><p>He was standing in a cornfield, one of his sisters walked out to him, "I heard you just had a meeting about irritating the corn" she smirked<p>

"What?"

"I personally, didn't think you would need help **irritating** the corn, but your wife seemed to think so" she laughed

"I … what?"

"Well, that's what she told me" she just continued laughing at the ridiculousness of what she was saying

"Where is my wife?"

"In the house" she pointed toward the mansion his family had lived in for generations

He walked past her and into the old house, trying to find her and wondering who she was; he stopped one of his brothers, "Where is my wife?"

"In your room, but you probably don't want to disturb her right now"

"Why not?"

"She's sleeping"

"In the middle of the day?"

"Boq, don't be so cold, she's still recovering after all"

"What happened?"

"Well … she … you know … again"

"What?"

"She tried to kill herself again, Boq"

"I…" he had a wife who tried to kill herself … multiple times? "Why?"

"Well, she's kind of a pampered little thing, isn't she? Kind of having a hard time adjusting to the country" he shrugged.

Boq stumbled away from him, why couldn't he have a marriage that didn't involve pity or suicide? He made his way to his old bedroom, there was a woman sleeping in his bed. A pretty woman in silken sheets … did he know her? Wasn't that Milla, one of Galinda's friends from Shiz? Her arm was out, showing the scars of her many attempts at death.

He shook his head, why couldn't he be with someone who just loved him? There in the corner were his old journals; did he want to use them? He was finally free to be with his family who he hadn't seen in years? Yet he was married to a woman who found life with him so undesirable that she wanted to kill herself. He wanted a life with someone who could love him … just love him.

* * *

><p>"Don't you know you're worth a million of her?" It was Elphaba, who was she talking about? Did it matter? "No, not to me … I didn't mean to me!" Then she stood up, but before she could leave he grabbed her hand. She looked back at him, "Boq" then he felt his world beginning to fade again.<p>

* * *

><p>He sat up; something didn't feel right … actually, he couldn't feel at all. He looked down at his hands and his eyes widened … burlap? He stood up uneasily, it was hard to catch his balance with this strange body … was he a scarecrow? He looked around the room and noticed that there was a bed; a woman was sleeping in it … a <strong>green<strong> woman. He stumbled backwards, this wasn't right … although, it did explain why the scarecrow disappeared. Yet, wouldn't that mean that Elphaba was still alive? He supposed the idea of her being melted by water was rather silly.

He made his way over to a window; he wanted to know where it was they were hiding … only it didn't look like any place he had ever seen before. Were they even in Oz? This wasn't right … he didn't want to live in isolation as a scarecrow! How had this even happened? It didn't matter, where were his journals? There … in the corner, he stumbled over and opened one of the books so he could read the words.


	4. A House

A/N: Chapter Warnings: Character death and Bessa

* * *

><p>He was looking down at a schoolbook and notes. He looked up; he was at the library with Nessarose staring at him, "Is something wrong?"<p>

"What?" he shifted nervously

"You stopped mid-sentence" she smiled, "Then just stared at your notes again"

"What was I talking about?"

She laughed, "History, we were studying, remember?" an uncertain look crossed her face

He tilted his head; he was studying with Nessa? "We're studying?"

She blinked; "Boq, you're acting very strange" he looked back down at his notes

He sighed, looking up at her, "I don't feel like studying"

"Why not?" she looked at him nervously

"I just don't"

She looked around for a second before looking back at him, "Then why are we here?"

He looked at her nervous expression, "I…" he watched as she curled some of her long silky hair behind her ear, "I…" Her hand trailed down her neck to the collar of her shirt, "I…" he blinked and looked up at her eyes, "What was the question?"

"Why are we here?" she looked patient, not the least bit annoyed. Then she licked her lip, drawing his attention there … why had she always been so hard to resist back here? Back at Shiz, she was so young and beautiful. Here she was again, before everything … before every lie, before every law. He wasn't bound to her by any means, he wasn't even supposed to be here for her … yet he still found her so hard to look away from. Was he leaning in? Surely not … surely he wouldn't do that … surely not.

Then their lips met, hers were so warm … so soft. She tasted like peppermint, sweet peppermint. She smelled wonderful, she was so warm and he was starting to feel dizzy … so very dizzy …

* * *

><p>He was in his room … what was that horrid smell? It was overwhelming; he stumbled out of his room to find the source. There were flies in the halls; all leading to the room the smell came from … Nessa's study. He timidly opened the door, he wasn't sure if he wanted to know anymore, but couldn't seem to stop himself. He slowly walked up to and around her chair; the smell was stronger here.<p>

There she was; her hair in a bun and wearing the dress she had been the day she shrank his heart. Only he was still human, still wearing his servant uniform. There she was, sitting in her chair with the bell in her hand. She was covered in blood; pieces of wood seemed to be sticking out in places that didn't make any sense … bones broken.

She was dirty, bloody, and dead. Why was she here? His uniform already soiled with dirt and blood like he had brought her here. Had he? Had he dug her out of under that house and brought her here? Just to put her back in that chair with that horrible bell she ordered him around with? Why would he do that?

The house seemed empty except for them … with that smell, he could see why. It was nauseating … overwhelming. He had to leave this room; he ran out of it and down the hall, he couldn't bear being in there any longer. Why would he do that? Why would he put her back in that chair? He ran back to his room to find his journals, he had to change something … anything if it meant not being here.

* * *

><p>He was standing in a crowd … Nessa was in the center of it, standing. That was strange, she was talking about something … making a speech. Animal rights … an army against the Wizard … was she going to fight with Elphaba? He felt a tug at his sleeve, "Can you help me?" it sounded like a little girl<p>

He looked down at her, she was crying, "What's wrong?"

"I can't find my parents, I'm lost" Her sadness seemed to cast a shadow around them … no, wait, that was an actual shadow. That meant …

"Hold on" he ran away from the girl, Nessa hadn't noticed the shadow, she was reading from a paper. He jumped out toward her, grabbing her arms and pulling her away from where she was. She seemed confused … until the house hit the ground where she had been.

They just lied there, with him having fallen on top of her, their arms around each other, in shock of what just happened. He suddenly let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding before he noticed the scowls directed his way … he had just saved the Wicked Witch of the East. Then he felt his body beginning to fade again.

* * *

><p>Suddenly he was stumbling through the halls after entering the Governor's estate, bumping into the walls and having a hard time standing upright. He finally just sat down when Nessarose opened the door in front of him, her eyes widened into worry as she knelt down beside him, "Boq, what happened?"<p>

He looked down at his disheveled clothing, "I don't remember"

She looked at the top of his head, "You don't remember?" he shook his head; she reached out and touched a spot on his head that stung him, she quickly pulled her hand back, "What do you remember?"

"What I remember doesn't make any sense"

"Tell me anyway"

"The last thing I remember is being at the library with you, I told you I didn't feel like studying, and then I kissed you … do you remember that?"

She nodded, her lip trembling, "Yes, Boq, but that was so long ago"

"Then I-I stopped a house from falling on you. That's all I remember"

She stroked his cheek with her hand, "That's all you remember? You don't remember anything else ... anything at all?"

He shook his head, "No, I don't remember anything else"

There was a tear falling down her cheek, "You hit your head, Boq"

"It doesn't matter"

* * *

><p>He eventually came across his journals again, but the sparkling tears had vanished and the power faded, though he didn't try to use them. He figured he wasn't in prison, he wasn't made of tin or straw, he wasn't blind, he wasn't keeping corpses, and he wasn't married to someone who wanted to kill themselves because of him. He was with someone who loved him ... really loved him. He could finally let himself be happy ... because honestly, there wasn't anywhere else he would rather be.<p> 


End file.
